Hope your all well, thanks for joining me again this week. Am trying to keep up with blogging twice per week, must admit it’s hard as am homeschooling my princess Amarni-Anna whose now 7 years old. 👋🏾
So when it’s term time things are hectic here in my house as a single mother of 3 I do everything. #wonderwomen, well done to all the hard working mothers out here, weather your staying at home or going out to work your doing a fantastic job.
So your a Mom? Maybe a new mom feeling overwhelmed? Single mother Feeling alone? Enjoying & Embracing motherhood? Do you take time to be kind to YOU? We teach our children each day to be kind to others while being kind to THEMSELVES! But can you hand on heart say your kind to yourself? Mindfulness and kindness ( Compassion ) goes hand in hand.
🧘♀️ Let’s Chill 🧘♀️
Before I go any further STOP. Grab a cuppa or glass of wine whatever you fancy! Find a quiet place to read the rest of this blog post. Take 3 deep breaths in but on the last breath hold it for 10 seconds before you exhale 😮💨 now relax & let’s chat! let’s talk about self kindness ( self compassion ).
What is Self compassion | Self Kindness, in a nutshell it’s to value, yourself being mindful of how you treat yourself. Which impacts those around you especially as a mother. ( My perception).
Self-compassion is extending compassion to one’s self in instances of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering. Kristin Neff has defined self-compassion as being composed of three main elements – self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. Source of clarification Wikipedia
A lot of us claim we take time out for ourselves but are YOU LYING 🤥. When is the last time you took a walk | trip just you, no pets, no friends, not with your partner nor children or anyone just YOU! Just to be with yourself, so you can spend time doing the things you enjoy, things to benefit your mental state of mind, giving yourself time to be at peace with whom you are without feeling alone ENJOYING YOUR OWN COMPANY! As mother’s we should prioritise some quality down time. After the cooking, cleaning attending to your children’s and or your spouses needs.
😳 Take A break like for Real 😳
Buying a drink while out with our families ain’t the same think of how much different things are when you get a day away from your children it’s even cheaper to eat out yes because your only buying FOR ONE! oh yeah that you. Seems strange even the thought that’s why my opening statement is that we must be sure we aren’t feeding ourselves fabricated information.
So maybe the answer to taking time out for you is the same as I which is partially. Now you’re at this part of the blog or is the answer NO! Ask yourself the question Again.
Crystal Martin
Why don’t we give ourselves permission as mothers to do things on our own sometimes so we can up keep our own standards without guilt nor regret. When is the last time you visited The spa wouldn’t that be nice some peace & relaxation. Check that link go to Wowcher then download the app they have some amazing spa breaks with great Discounts.
Meditation 🧘♀️ can be done when your children are asleep or away at playgroups. You can find free guided Meditation Apps the app I use is called Bloom Use code BETTERYOU for your Free Trail.
- Smiling each Day find a reason to Smile
- Being mindful of your thoughts we can’t control what comes into our minds but we can control the emphasis and effort we give to negative thoughts
- Forgive yourself letting go of things beyond your control being ok to F@k up.
- Try to find the positives through out the negatives is the glass half empty or half full
I am encouraging you all to take a break, not just get a take away for dinner then feel guilty as you brought one too many take aways this month. Like a real break one where you grant yourself permission not to worry or call the children 20 times while away. The truth is our Kids love to have a break from us too, hear me out am night saying your not a great mom however we are their mothers so we worry we fuss and baby them while they grow up they do sometimes want space also to express while experiencing new things.
💰I Do No Have Money For Trips!
Okay so I know as mother we worry a lot, this situation with covid has left some of us down financially. However think of all you do, your the Chef, Cleaner , Counsellor, Referee, chauffeur, laundry lady, first-aid officer, Chef inspector of worrying. Oh yeah we are the families representative at every appointment 😂😂 don’t you think you deserve to be kinder to yourself.
What if I told you there are free Trips yes you heard some trips don’t have to cost you money, would you reconsider taking time out for you, if it wouldn’t affect the families budget in a ball busting way.
These breaks don’t have to be expensive Top 10 Mum Breaks, when wanting a break alone or To get low priced breaks with my children. These are some of the sites an apps I use. Booking.com, groupon those two are my favourites.
Self kindness | Self Compassion includes so more than going out. Mental realignment, patients is required. Yes there are factors but it can be as simple as taking that 10 mins when it’s quite to do a cross word, being kind to us when we make mistakes, understanding that we can fall and get right back up. There are many ways you can take timeout just for you without leaving your children.
Here’s a few things to try
- Ask A relative or a person whom you trust to watch your children once per 2 weeks for (15mins) then go for a walk
- Try to establish a routine at home so your children are settled by 9pm the latest then watch a film ( NO NOT PJ MASK 😂)
- Take a longer than usual bath (once) per week why not read a book while your at it
- Breathing Exercise to help with self awareness
- ⭐️Read my blog twice per week I’ll help you relax ⭐️
- If you like jogging 🏃♂️ then do so if able
- Most Importantly NEVER FORGET TO BE POLITE | FORGIVING 2 YOU!
- Reading & Singing to your baby is good for you both
So do be kind to yourself lack of self compassion leads to mental ill health which some mothers already suffer from please speak to someone if your feeling isolated | depress or anxious a medical professional would be best as you will be given the right information. Remember your health is to be taken seriously it might just be nothing to worry about.
Thanks so much for reading my post today, please share, follow oh please please turn them notifications on. Can you relate to any of the points raised in this post let’s meet up in the comments.
P. S am looking forward to speaking with you. Remember falling in not important it’s what we do when we get back up that counts the most xoxo 💋 see you again soon Love Crystal & Kids.
Be Kind To You Mummie
Motherhood No Instructions 